When Mary Hendricks-Gendlin introduced me to Gene in the mid-nineties I had just been chosen as a new TIFI Coordinator and he responded by saying “Another angel has been sent to us.” He was referring to the beginning of my videography career, which would barely qualify as sainthood.

It was a great honour for me to be asked to prepare a DVD compilation for Gene’s Memorial Service. I was happy to accept. When I started to think what would be the way to go about it, I found myself being overwhelmed by the wealth of choice I knew I had and how to show the best of who Gene was. The 12 minute compilation I made was an attempt to dip into many rich areas of Gene’s work. But even more important was finding the clips of Gene the man, the person and friend, to tap into his sense of humour and care for each person he met, and his unwavering steadiness about his message. I took the time to remember what I can draw from my experiences and memories of many years of working with Gene. I had followed him with my cameras to so many different presentations and conferences.

YouTube https://youtu.be/R5FxuMGRXtM

As I am writing this article, I’m remembering one of my first experiences of filming Gene. It was in Washington DC at a conference and Gene was one of many speakers. I was invited to videotape and produce his presentation. I was alone that time, with rookie experience of setting my two cameras and the lapel mikes in the best possible place to reach Gene’s chair. There were about sixty chairs prepared in a large oval. I successfully taped lapel mike cables to the carpeted floor and was ready! The minute Gene entered the room full of people, he would say - what I learned later he would always say - “No, no, no, I don’t want you that far away. I want you all to come closer to me,” not in an oval, but in a kind of crowd that he could see and communicate with, face to face, closely. Cameras and cables had to be moved in the shortest possible time. Pulling taped cables off the floor in a hurry is not the way to go about it - I ended with a huge, permanently glued ball of unusable cables.

It was a special privilege to witness and participate in Gene’s building of Thinking at the Edge - TAE philosophical practice. Once a year for six years, I was exposed to his fine thinking processes as he was ex- plaining, refining and fine tuning the steps for TAE. I would come home with more than twenty hours of footage that I needed to choose from to fit onto a two hour DVD. The wealth of learning from Gene in this way was enormous. Going over and over the same bits of footage, making decisions about how to avoid losing anything crucial, how to identify what he said two or three times in the same presentation and how to blend and bind the crux of it into one smooth message.

At one of those workshops he introduced me as his co-presenter in his always respectful and humorous way by saying: ”Nada peculiarly spent more time on TAE and the Steps. She has also spent more time with me than I have with me, which is a very interesting thing. I thought about it yesterday. To edit video, to edit something, it means to look at it fifty times and more, so to have Nada teaching the steps is wonderful for me and I can’t do anything wrong, whatever I tell you, she’ll fix it.”

YouTube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XnWWCEJIzU8

And in many ways it was true. I knew Gene better than he knew me but he trusted me completely and gave me complete freedom to produce his wisdom in the way I chose. I spent hours and hours staring at him on the screen and listening to his voice, wisdom, jokes, and profound ... words ... that penetrated deeply into my psyche. My husband said to Gene on one occasion that when listening to his voice at home (as I was editing) he had the feeling Gene was living with us.

Of course Gene’s yearly visits to FISS (The Focusing Institute Summer School), where he spent a whole afternoon with us, were special. Five summers he mingled intimately with already bonded groups of sometimes more than a hundred participants. He loved it when people asked him all sorts of questions. He was at his best answering and teaching that way. I edited and produced all five years’ recordings into DVDs titled ‘A Day With Gene,’ ‘ In touch With Gene,’ etc.

With my very limited knowledge of German, I had an interesting experience in producing a set of five TAE DVDs in German. A group of German and Swiss participants flew to the US for this special treat. I felt pretty confident that by then I knew enough of TAE to be able to follow and turn out this production.

My son Goran composed all the music for my productions. The music he provided for me was not directed for a particular DVD. I had my felt sense to make the choice, from many pieces of music he had composed and recorded for me. At some times Goran also helped me with my ‘two camera filming’. So he was tuned into Gene’s ways, his thinking, personality and sometimes unexpected problems with lapel mikes that would get caught in Gene’s jacket zipper. On one of those occasions when Goran was attaching a microphone on Gene’s collar, he had his first experience of Gene’s philosophy and humour. As Go- ran was fiddling with the mike, Gene said to him: “Do we have to do what we want to do?” Goran reminded me of that sentence many times through the years with a smile and some bafflement.

I know that, as a teacher and more so as a DVD producer, the results of my collaboration with Gene have reached many people globally. And now that Gene is not physically present with us, it is such a gift to be able to see him and hear him and share his presence.

Some of my clips of Gene can be found on my webpage at:

http://www.nadalou.com/Nada_new/DVD_YouTube_GENE.html

and at my YouTube channel at:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1BwskRK56OUGmb9WSO9H7Q?view_as=subscriber

There are also some of my clips on The International Focusing Institute’s YouTube channel. DVDs can be purchased from both these websites.

Nada Lou is known throughout the Focusing world for her specialty in Thinking at the Edge and Focusing. She has taught many courses around the world since the 1990s. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U24H3cHFYLs She is the author of “The Grassroots Introduction Manual to TAE” and is the prolific video maker of 45 DVDs featuring Focusing. Immersing herself in Gendlin’s thinking through DVD Productions has made Nada one of the world’s experts in TAE. Since co-presenting TAE with Dr. Gendlin, Nada evolved a personal TAE course called THINK DIFFERENT - FOCUSING FOR THINKING, and is spreading this practice as program, live lectures, seminars and webinar. www.nadalou.com nadalou@nadalou.com